I’ve been trying to be more vulnerable on here lately. Not only in showing my face more, but in the posts themselves. Today I woke up and I felt sad. My life feels wonderful, I just finished Christmas shopping, my birthday is coming up, and yet I still woke up with a lingering sadness. My first thought was that I had no reason to be, I was not allowed to be😬 Now, I grew up denying most emotions besides happiness and joy. Any of them I deemed negative-anger, sadness, frustration-I denied myself the opportunity to feel out of self preservation. Slowly and late in life, I have recently been learning about these emotions🌓And one of the biggest things I have learned is that there doesn’t always have to be a reason, but just because there isn’t, doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to feel them. I have heard from some spiritual people that we humans are all badass souls because we were put on this earth to experience an entire gamut of the most difficult, and at times most rewarding, emotions🌎So feel them. That’s what we are here to do. If you need to cry, cry! If you need to scream, give it all you’ve got💥You are not defined by your emotions, especially the fleeting ones. The ones that make you not want to leave your bed that day, the ones that make you so angry you might explode, the ones you don’t even understand. But that’s exactly it. You don’t have to always understand them, but you do have to feel them and once you do, they will pass. I have learned from fighting them for so long that it is the worst thing to do. You are allowed to feel everything🌹There is no right reason, there doesn’t even have to be one. You are allowed to feel them simply because you are human. You are not your emotions, but you are your courage to feel them, your raw authenticity, your willingness to love yourself even when you feel your worst and your strength to turn those tears back into the smile that shines so beautifully on your face. If it’s not there today, don’t worry, I promise it will be back soon. Hold on to that knowing and you can wisely accept any emotion that arises, realizing that it too will pass because you are one badass soul🌈🦅🐺🦋🔥☄🌪
I read an old quote recently that came up as a memory on Facebook. I had posted it when I was in high school and to this day, it still resonates with me: “Before you can conquer a beast, you must first make it beautiful.” ❤️Recently, I had one of those Earth quaking moments. Those realizations that change the course in your life and you can never move backwards from. It was a moment where I looked at my past, I looked at the people who have caused much pain in my life, and I felt love towards them. I put myself in their shoes and empathized with where their hurtful actions come from, and realized that they do NOT have to do with me, but unfortunate things that may be going on in their own life. These actions are NOT proof of my worth, but testaments to the place these people are at on their course. I let go of the control of the things and the people I cannot change and the people I can’t make better. The people that are on their own self journey, and though it may be influencing mine, that too is part of theirs✨There is power in accepting the things you can’t control. Power in accepting that other people’s treatment of you is not a reflection of what you deserve or what you are worth. Abuse does not mean you are weak or that it’s the type of love that is meant for you. A person’s detachment does not mean you are not worthy of time. It means these people are working through their trials and you are there to be a part of it. It’s okay to be hurt. It’s okay to be angry, to be sad, to feel confused or to be in denial. In fact these things are necessary human responses that allow us to process our life and our own journey☀️But there comes a point in the process, where the hurt may still exist, but there is also acceptance. You come to realize that these hurts and these tears and this anger that come from this person, they are beautiful. Because they are YOU. You would not be you without the rock bottoms you have lived in or the darkness you have stood in. You come to realize that you are beautiful because these things and these people that have made you feel the opposite do not get to determine your self worth. You are a beast and you are beautiful🐗
I once fell in love with Turkey when I visited the country. The colors, the passion, the kindness, the apple tea in every shop. So much so that for a while I wanted the word “love” tattooed in Turkish, and I wanted it even more when I found out that translated it looked like the word “ask.” Because you never know someone’s story until you ask✨You don’t have the answers, you should never judge or assume about someone’s life because you don’t know the history that has led to their current smile. Maybe we post nice photos or statuses but we all still have our things that we suffer with. We are all doing our best with what we’re given in this life✨ There’s moments where we are met with the fragility of life. You never know when it will rear its ugly head for you or someone close to you🌊 The fresh scars I for the first time saw on the wrist of one I almost had to say good bye to. The ones that nobody saw because they hid them under their sleeves. Reminding you that, yes, life can change in an instant, so hold on to the things, the people that make you happy. Hold on to them and love them like hell, because you both deserve it. Reminding you that you don’t know everyone’s story, so be kind. Love them for your sake, love them for their sake, love strangers, love YOU! Love regardless of your fear because you never know if they will be gone. Love because there are those who are wishing they were. It is a constant fact that they can be. Love others BECAUSE of your fear for you know that everyone too fears in some way, struggles in some way, so have empathy💕When you have love to give, wear your heart upon your sleeve for the sake of those family, those friends, those strangers who may be hiding something under theirs. Love because we’re all trying to figure it out. Be kind because we’re all doing the best we can with what we’ve got❤️💕#worldmentalhealthday We can’t always know who is struggling, we don’t wear our mental illnesses, ailments or hard times on our sleeves, we often don’t understand (and many don’t try to), but we CAN always help by showing compassion to those we meet, showing them they’re worthy and trying to understand even if we don’t know how to.