Let’s Ask the Hard Questions

Yesterday, one of my friends posted those tests that tell you which of 16 personalities you embody. I find them fascinating and with my answer (ENFP) came a quote “It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool- for love – for your dreams- for the adventure of being alive.”💙🦅🌲✨
Let’s ask each other the hard questions. Let’s take the time to get to know each other and understand what makes us who we are. Let’s learn all we can so we can be the best we can for someone in our communication, in our care, in our empathy, in our kindness, our compassion, our advice. Let’s try hard so we can read between the lines, we can see more than is shown and we can help more than is asked for⚡️If we really learn about the people around us, if we really know what hurts them, what makes them feel good, what makes them laugh, what makes them sad or angry or joyful, we can really know how to be the best and the kindest for them. Everything starts small🍄If we start with deeper connections in our own circle, express greater kindness within it, then hopefully those circles will grow, each person will show the same in their different circles and the compassion will propagate itself. And maybe one day we can make those circles expand enough to include the whole world in our efforts🌎🌍🌏So let’s ask! What motivates you to wake up each morning? What is your dream in life? What is your greatest fear and why is it so? Do you hold yourself back? If you had infinite power to change our world, how first would you make it better? Are you content with your life? If not, do you have the courage to change it? Where do you feel most at home? What would be your biggest regret in life and will you make sure you won’t have it? Who inspires you most? Do you prefer sunset or sunrise? If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? Do you like waterfalls best looking down at their whole or standing underneath their power? Do you roll around in the grass when you get the chance?🌾🍃🌱☘️IMG_6912

Fight the Dentist if you Must

When I was young, I had a dentist tell me I needed braces, so I never went back.. I liked that my teeth were maybe a little too big, the chip in my tooth was well earned in a soccer game and my imperfect teeth, I felt, made me me. It was before I started succumbing to the feelings of rejection and self judgment that led to bouts of unworthiness, depression, body dysmorphia, anorexia. In the words of Pink, “everyday I fought a war against the mirror.” When I found my teaching job, I realized that just by shining my light and being me, I could change someone’s life. It was not my looks, but my soul, my compassion, my quirks that made a difference and I loved myself for once✨But it is a constant battle I will always fight. Sometimes it rears its head without you even knowing that your insecurities are winning. Recently, I had more energy than I have in a few months and the epiphany set in. I was suddenly and unknowingly being nice to myself again, taking care of myself, feeding myself and it made me both happy and sad. Sad that our minds can make us be so mean to ourselves. Happy that I finally found compassion for myself again. Happy that I had a breakthrough in realizing, how was I supposed to be a beacon of light when I didn’t even have the energy to do so? How can I make sure kids love themselves and are being kind when I can’t even be kind to the one person who matters most? We make a difference not because of how we look, but because of how we make others feel. By showing them it’s wonderful to love yourself just the way you are and to smile because you do. There is so much power in not allowing your biology, your insecurities, your predispositions, your tendencies, your reflections to bring you down (it’s ok if they do at times) & letting your soul & heart lift you up. I think little me realized that my smile was a reflection of my soul and that was what mattered💫If only we all had that wisdom and knew that our imperfections, the chipped teeth, our battles we’ve fought against our mind and doubts make us beautiful because they make our heart and souls strong and empathetic. So fight that war against the mirror, and win. Even fight the dentist if you must😝IMG_6810

Love Your Darkness, Cast Your Light

I’d never seen my shadow cast like this before!🌒To the point where I was looking out from the top of a mountain to see my shadow doing the same. It was a neat perspective to see yourself standing on top of a mountain in that way. Knowing that because you were on top of the world, because you made it to that high point, the earth was able to capture you and show it to you. Not through a picture of yourself that you saw later, but right there in front of you, a tangible view of yourself, your imprint on the earth while you’re still present. It felt empowering⛰Standing there looking at the shape we created on the planet. Thinking about the shadow we cast on the earth, literally and metaphorically✨ I’ve been thinking about my shadow side a lot lately. The parts of ourself that we aren’t proud of, that we feel are hardest to love. Reactions and insecurities that our own personal histories have caused in us. I’ve felt some of mine rearing their head lately and it’s been a battle to keep them under control. To quiet the monkey mind, if you will🙊To accept that though these parts feel unloveable, they need the most love. We may feel they make us ugly, but they make us beautiful because they make us who we are. They may make us feel weak, but they really show the strength and power we have and have had to use to overcome the incidents that caused these insecurities in the first place💫We always see ourselves so differently from the way others see us. I am so lucky to say that now I have people in my life who make me feel that my shadow side is worthy and beautiful. And now it’s time for me to view it the same. We all see others as strong when they reveal their truths, when they have the courage to be raw and authentic, even when it’s with emotions that society may deem ‘negative.’ Now it’s time we start seeing ourselves the same. That our struggles make us strong, wise, beautiful, courageous and give us trials that, if we see them this way, we can turn them into a positive lesson and impart them on the world around us. We can cast our light if we accept our shadow✨💜🐾⚡️🌕

Always Chase the Light

Besides gratitude, one of the biggest lessons I learned in China was about my ego, about accepting non negotiable things I have when it comes to my own happiness✨ The particular camp we were scheduled to work at was one that was completely unexpected (I haven’t posted any pictures). It was an environment that made me feel trapped, isolated and with a lack of freedom. These things were no one’s fault, they were not intentional. They were simply cultural differences, variances in ways of life🌎 But I learned that just because something is from a different culture and I want to do my best to understand, respect and accept different ways of life, they will not always align with me, and that’s okay. I was trying with all my might to stay and teach in an environment that was not conducive to my well being, just so I could say I did it. So I didn’t have to explain why I was leaving, so I didn’t feel like I was giving up🌻 These are all struggles I have always battled: perfectionism, fear of failure, belief that choosing yourself first means giving up instead of showing courage. But I had to reframe my perspective, understand that it is okay to choose myself. That if I know I’m not happy and will not be, it is okay, it is wise to make a change. And it is best for everyone if I do💫 Best for me, best for those whose energy is influenced by my own, and even best for the children. Because I want to be myself for the kids, for the world. I want them to have a role model who is inspired, excited about life, goofy, uninhibited, and if I can’t be those sides of me, if I can acknowledge my unhappiness and leave the situation, it’s not giving up, it’s choosing me, choosing my purpose of spreading light and it’s okay to do that. It’s okay, it’s good to recognize when you feel you’re not shining your light and bring yourself back to the spaces that help you shine it. That’s what we’re here to do⛰🦁🐞🍄☀️🌈